My 2024 in Review

 My year in review:

I bought a house; started going to the Kansas Zen Center in Lawrence, the first Buddhist temple I've been to in at least ten years; did a lot to work through my memory loss, figuring out a lot about times in my life from over fifteen years ago that I had little to no recollection of for most of that time, even saw briefly, though this person turned out to be less than (or maybe about what) I expected on pretty much every front, someone at the KU Counseling Center, who didn't help with the issue or anything I brought to her, except she did help me to focus on my writing for a short while, and I made some significant headway in that area as a result of it; I combatted my anxiety even more; I walked over 3.65 million steps, getting an average of 10,000 a day; I took daily journaling about my life back up again, which I hadn't been doing for over three years, I got inspired to take my flute-playing back up after buying a bamboo flute during my trip to the Renaissance Fair; I've stepped back a little bit from my role I've taken in the Kansas City League of Autistics after four years, and it seems will do a lot of what I used to do for it, which is now going to be Neurodiverse KC, in junction with my job at the KU Center on Disabilities; I've been asked by my good friend and fellow disability rights activist Philip McGruder to continue the leading of the student community he founded at KU many years ago, Believe Autism Matters, which with the help of the KUCD Diversity, Equity, Inclusion, and Belonging Committee, I can do until the group has a more permanent government to allow it to do what it has done for years; I traveled to many places for work, Topeka, Sacrament, Newport, Kentucky, and Cincinnati; I e-mailed my senator and representatives almost every day to ask them to support abortion rights; I've donated to the Texas Equal Access Abortion Fund nearly every week since about the beginning of July; and after doing so much spelling out of messages with letters at Hobby Lobby that are contrary to their ideology for so many years, I finally got banned by corporate from doing it; besides that, I did make the choice to take some toxic people off my Facebook/out of my life, of whom I really should have done that to a long time ago and never even had them there to begin with, but I made new friends and reconnected with some old ones; I also happened to look back at one novella I thought I'd finished, only to find a couple of necessary passages missing and do much needed proofreading on it and other writing projects; and I finished the year strong by selling a bookmark I made from one of my dad's business cards to the wife of one of his former clients; finishing reading a novel and a graphic novel I started as well as the TV show I was watching, getting rid of some last minute dust, making sure all my plastic bag recycling had been taken to the grocery store, cleaning out Muggsie's food cup and scooping his litter box, one last load of laundry, and doing a lot of decluttering of my house and car, and laying the grounds to declutter more in the future.

My goal for next year: write and illustrate my prose and graphic novel stories, building on the momentum I've gained this year and work more in working through my memory loss, reaching out to people who would be able to give me information; read books that I want to read and also may very well help me with my writing; practice my flute; and get my blood pressure down so I can give blood, for various reasons, by going on overnight trips to Missouri and Kansas towns with the friends I've traveled with like I planned to this year, cuddling Muggsie, my cat, spend time with friends, watching some shows and movies, walking a lot, and doing some cooking and crocheting that I had planned to do with the new time I now have, since more Neurodiverse KC stuff will be through work. On the political front, I plan to first, remember what Judy, one of the teachers at the Kansas Zen Center said, not to catastrophize, mentioning how refugees from Laos avoided the Laotian army and Vietnamese boat people avoided pirates by staying calm, and to work to ensure our freedoms are protected through several lines of defense - courts, media, and cities and states - strengthen the defenses autistic and marginalized people have in Lawrence, Kansas, and Missouri through helping Neurodiverse KC and Believe Autism Matters, reach out and cultivate alliances with oppressed groups around the world to help the cause of our democracy and civil rights, continue writing to my legislators, give to abortion funds what I can as I see the need and potential, join protests and events in Lawrence and, if none are there, in Kansas City, and also work to support the businesses in my area that are threatened by tariffs as well as the post office by buying things I will use (juice for my smoothies, snacks for watching TV with, cooking supplies), like postage stamps that I have on and off again maintained a collection of, which includes those that belonged to my great-grandfather to me year ago, and I plan to be there to give morale and strength and provide other support people through the next year of the hooded Oompa-loompa's presidency. Goodbye, 2024.

My 2023 in Review

 My year in review: though it was the year I lost my dad to cancer and my granddad to Parkinson's, it was also a year where I got promoted from research aide to assistant researcher at work, went with my friends, Tyler and Kevin to spend a weekend in St. Joseph, Missouri, went with several work people and friends to an Association of University Centers on Disability in Washington, D.C, e-mailing my senators and representatives almost every day of the year asking them to support abortion rights, and doing a lot to fight my anxiety, among other things. My resolution for the new year: look at finding a townhouse or a condo in Lawrence, enjoy trips in Kansas or Missouri an hour away from Kansas City with friends, work on finishing a couple of the books I started this year in addition to some of the ones on my reading list, continue to work toward finishing a few novels and stories I have started on, continue my journey in dealing with my memory loss, and do what I can to stop a president or Congress who are either Trump or someone who would pardon him for his crimes or sign any kind of national abortion ban from coming to power. Happy New Year, everybody!

My 2022 in Review

The highlights of my year: the one-year anniversary of starting my job as a research aide at the Kansas University Center on Developmental Disabilities; moving to Lawrence, Kansas; going to Washington, D.C. with KUCDD for the annual Association of University Centers on Disabilities, where I met disabled rights activists Liz Weintrub and Emily Ladau; went on another overnight weekend trip with Tyler and Kevin; came up with and started on several new novels in addition to gauging my prospects of finishing and hopefully publishing them in the new future, and finished the first draft of a novella; discovered more about my memory loss of events from thirteen years ago and resolved to find an EMDR specialist in Lawrence to help me uncover more of the chapters of my live that I lost my access to; and, though Roe vs. Wade was overturned by six judges appointed by presidents who lost the popular vote, Kansas struck down an amendment that would have allowed further suppression of abortion in the state, kept its governor and judges that will honor the Kansas constitution's position that abortion is a right, and anti-choice Republicans failed to take the Senate and an overwhelming House majority necessary for a national abortion ban.

My New Year's resolution: finish a few of the books I started on in the last two years, continue writing a new of my novels to get a sense of the possibility of finishing and publishing at least one of them, and find and work with an EMDR specialist in Lawrence to uncover more of the lost memories of things I experienced many years ago. Here's to a new year, everyone!

A Serious Message to My Fellow Buddhists Out there

    With the leak of the Supreme Court document that casts the future of abortion rights in a very fragile place, I want to say this to every Buddhist/Buddhist practitioner reading this. I have seen a number of fellow Buddhists in reading their works, of all sects, all cultures, all backgrounds, launching attacks on abortion and the right to have one, even calling it murder. I have read this in the work by teachers and scholars, and I just want to say one thing: stop it!

    I know many who wrote those things come from cultural backgrounds I am not a part of. Some of them also come from my own white, upper/middle class Judeo-Christian origin background. Regardless, if this message enters into the eyes and ears of American people whose right to abortion now looks like it's very much going to be up to state's decision, I want to say that this post is about you, and I want to say that I will take a stand in this.

    How did Buddhists get to this place? I honestly don't know. I blame much of what is about to happen to abortion rights on white, Evangelical, conservative Christians, but I am not about to stop (what I believe is), isolated incidences of Buddhist writers attacking abortions and bringing the Dharma's name into this!

    I get it: one of the Buddhist precepts is Do Not Destroy Life, but seriously! Number one, he Buddha never said, as far as I am aware, that a fetus is life. Many, in fact most, Buddhists still eat meat (including myself). Why can't these teachers attack that like they have made statements on abortion rights. Second, presuming abortion is taking a life (which is, in my mind, just aa distraction from the real issue regarding abortion rights), the Buddha did say that killing could be justified. Are you all about to take a time machine, go to Tibet, and tell all the Tibetan people, monks included, who took up arms that they can't use weapons against genocidal Maoists?! Many of these soldiers are just following orders (not that that is an acceptable excuse after all), and honestly, Lord Buddha never made much statements on what killing (presuming abortion is that) is acceptable and what is not. And really, if you're a Buddhist and you're drinking alcohol, a lot of Buddhists would say you should just shut up

    A lot of American Buddhists I have found, are quite liberal people. We believe in the right to marry, we don't support putting people in jail for smoking marijuana, the thought of a woman president really doesn't bother us. But when I look at (really just a few writers, but still) any Buddhist that has maligned abortion (and the overwhelmingly poor, disabled people and people with serious medical conditions, and those who can't have a child because they will die if they do who have them), I am reminded of one thing: the problems of American Buddhism is rooted in the problems of America. I am not pointing fingers at American Buddhists in particular. Tibetan, Thai, Chinese, French, and every other cultural form of Buddhism have problems rooted in the country they are practiced in. But American Buddhists need to reckon with how the flaws of American society and culture have seeped into our communities and ourselves. Our sanghas our often very racially segregated. Buddhists of Asian descent are just casually erased by Prius-driving, Upper Middle Way Buddhists. Poor people are driven away because they can't afford the costs of meditation retreats or Dharma talks. As an autistic, I have often felt very uncomfortable in largely neurotypical Buddhist groups and many NT Buddhists as well. But why am I saying this? Because when Buddhists, and Americans of all faiths, from hegemonic backgrounds don't see such people, they do not see people who are affected most by the attacks on abortion taking place across the country.

    Unlike the movement for Blacks Americans' rights, indigenous peoples' movements, feminism, and the disability rights movement, the Pro-Life (generous name, but ok) movement is not about standing up to the powerful. Rather, it has been about attacking vulnerable and threatened people whose vulnerability and threats are the whole reason they have abortions in the first place!

    My religion that I have practiced seventeen years asks me that I do whatever I can to help people, to bring comfort to those who are without it, to give those shedding tears as much reason to smile and rejoice from emotions as strong as their pain. I write this post to show that I am not going to stand against the attacks against abortion from Buddhists in comfortable positions. I do this to bring attention to what has been done in my community and the hypocrisy behind it that runs through the very core of the Pro-Forced birth movement. I might stir things up in the Buddhist world, but when you're cooking something, stirring things up is the only way anything gets done.

My 2021 in Review

 The high points of my year, while there were some lousy lows, this year I: got my COVID vaccine, ditched a toxic therapist, got a new job as a research aide at the Kansas University Center on Developmental Disabilities, ended up having my apartment to myself and my cat, finished several short stories and the first draft of a novella minus a title and an author's note, started on a novel that I have made a plan to finish by next year, got my COVID booster and flu shot, asked a person out for the first time in two years, even though I got rejected, and got involved with An Evening with the Rents to raise money for Camp Encourage that serves autistic people ages 8-18. My New Year's Resolution: continue to acclimate to my new job, find an outlet for several of my short stories, find a way to publish my novella, finish my novel, spend time with the people I care about most, let my friends (at least the ones I see in real life) in on parts of my life that I haven't let them in on before, limit my activities outside of work and other obligations more when it is good and conceivable, and check my outline on the things that are my day-to-day life.

My 2020 in Review

My year in review: getting an apartment with my middle brother as my roommate; finishing a second term of service as a VISTA for UMKC’s Propel program; finishing the KUMC Leadership and Education in Neurodevelopmental and Related Disabilities (LEND) certificate program; reforming and organizing the Kansas City League of Autistics, an advocacy organization that had not been active for over two years; walking almost every day I’m not working and losing at least ten pounds; adopting a kitten from KC Pet Project; finishing several of my short stories and submitting one to six different fiction magazines, with five rejecting me and one I haven’t heard back from; working on a novel everyday for at least three months hoping this time to actually finish it by the end of May next year and submit it to publishers; taking back my old job for the time being bagging at the grocery store while also being trained and working as a backup cashier until I find a more permanent job; getting in touch with old friends from high school; supporting people I care about who have been laid off during shutdowns; and that’s not to mention Biden winning the electoral vote and the discovery of a Coronavirus vaccine. My New Year’s Resolution (not that I have to wait until the new year to do this): finish my novel, finish several more short stories and get them accepted by magazines, and sell my crafts on Etsy. A new challenge lies ahead.

2Jed Shredwards and Lejohn-art Caldwell-roddy

Autism Acceptance Month 2020

Well, even if it is quarantine season for me and many others across the country, it is still Autism Acceptance Month for me and the actually autistic community and allies starting tomorrow, Autism Awareness Month for those who believe the false prophets of Autism Speaks and similar organizations, a time wear those pushing for Autism Acceptance wear gold, red, taupe, orange, green, and purple for acceptance-since the chemical symbol for gold Au is the first two letters of the work "Autistic," and wear those promoting "Awareness" wear blue due to Autism Speaks still mostly blue puzzle piece symbol (the puzzle piece being abhorred by proud autistics) made on the rapidly discredited idea that their are four boys with autism for every girl, a belief that has robbed many women, girls, and non-binary autistic individuals a chance at services and a better life, leading to anorexia, bilumnia, and suicide of many women, girls, and non-binary folks, some who I have known personally. So enough if the only places I can go are gorcery stores, take-out restaurants, my mom's house, and the Mission Hills courthouse to clear a traffic ticket, I will, as I have done for the last five years, abstain from wearing blue except for the rainbow infinity autistic symbol, and wear gold, red, taupe, orange, green, and purple to promote an antidote and alternative to the thinkinng that leads a disproportionate number of autistic and disabled individuals in poverty, unemployment, prisons-despite a being less likely then non-disabled people to commit crimes, whether at home or not. Happy Autism Acceptance Month!